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Ask Judy: Can I take my child out for lunch? |
Dear Judy:
My daughter just started kindergarten in a public school with a very big school yard. Her schedule is robust with no play and all academics, mostly spent in a very warm classroom. At lunchtime, the kindergartners stay in the cafeteria watching the others play and then are lined up outside in the yard for the last five minutes (again watching the other kids play) until their teachers come to get them so they can begin the next three hours in the warm classroom.
I have spoken to the teachers, the parent coordinator, and the principal about the “why” behind this physically unhealthy and “mean” policy. No straight answers yet, I’m still hoping.
Am I allowed to get my child during the lunch hour and bring her back to school after lunch? When I was a kid this was allowed. I want my young child to have some physical activity during the school day.
Kindergarten parent
Dear Kindergarten parent,
Lunch in or out? There is no city regulation governing this question; it is the school principal who determines the policy at each school. However a principal can’t keep individual parents from taking their child out to lunch.
For years and years many children went home for lunch, escorted by their mothers. That was in the “olden days” when women did not work and kids walked back and forth from school. Today it is rare, but not unheard of. There are logistics to work out: You will have to sign your daughter in and out of school every lunchtime. You and the school will have to decide where you will pick her up, what happens if you are late, who will be responsible for her until you show up, and how will you inform the staff of exceptions. Besides adding a layer of supervision, these are understandable concerns for the safety of your daughter. You must work out suitable procedures with the principal and stick to them.
Maybe you would be better off putting your energies to working out how to provide exercise and fresh air for all the kindergarten kids. I polled a few parents and grandparents about the wisdom of taking their children out of school for lunch, they agreed that fresh air is essential to kids. But, mostly they were concerned that pulling a child out would single her out, keep her from socializing with classmates, and from learning how to negotiate the less than ideal cafeteria conditions that most kids face in school.
The Parents Association, the School Leadership Team, and the parent coordinator can work on this problem, particularly if you assemble a group of parents to put the issue on the agenda. At many schools, parent volunteers supervise the recess part of lunch.
In my experience, there are several reasons schools are reluctant to take kids out: lack of supervision for a playground full of kids, and the time it takes to get children dressed for cold winter weather are two often cited concerns. As for your school administrators, they seem to make the effort to get kids dressed to stand outside for a few minutes, but when cold weather sets in the kids will probably be inside the whole time. Parent volunteers can be particularly helpful whether they are there to help kids get dressed for wintry weather, or to help supervise games or other activities.
The Department of Education is making a big push to improve kids’ diets through improving school food; officials need to be convinced that daily exercise and fresh air are equally important for health. If I were a parent right now, I would lobby for that.
Judy
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you have to be kidding me!!! take your children out to lunch!! by the time this poor parent tackles the ridiculous policy etc, etc, etc, her child will be in high school, your advice about leting a kindergarten student ‘negotiate’ this less than ideal situation is not age appropriate, this mom should be encouraging all the other parents and guardians who can to take their children out too, that would remove any nonsensical ‘stigma’ (also ridiculous in my view and not going to happen) and send a much stronger message to the mean spirited principal who must run this probably overcrowded school that they have to change policies, by the time the pta, slt, parent coordination, tweed, etc etc etc are finished ‘reviewing’ this there will be some regulation saying parents cannot do it! i actually think it would be a good protest to start trying to do that citywide! even working parents might be able to get someone to pick their child up once a week or so, tweed and schools like this wouldn’t be able to handle the paperwork and it would send a great signal of being fed up with the mean spirited nonsense that passes for ‘policy’in our city today, why not start a movement at inside schools for that instead of recommmending keeping the poor child in the prison like environment?
Comment by parent — November 11, 2009 @ 8:26 am
I agree with the first comment. Sounds like it would not be hard to start a trend at this school and confound the misguided recess policy that way. At my children’s school we had a problem that this year there would not be enough supervisors for recess, but rather than eliminate it, our administration problem-solved and now half the grades go to recess before lunch and half after lunch — perhaps not 100% ideal, but a good solution to the problem.
Comment by A Parent — November 11, 2009 @ 12:27 pm
My children also attend a large school which limits recess time. Often it’s just lining up time. Classes asigned to different lunch aides are never allowed to play together. Children are Never allowed to run because they might fall down/there’s not enough room. Kindergarten students are NEVER allowed outside until the spring because the powers that be think they might run away if they’re allowed into the yard after lunch. We got them to at least allow the kindergarten students to spend lunch recess in the gym rather than watching cartoons in the auditorium. It’s horrible, but it’s no easy thing to get a school to change its sop. But, yes going out to lunch is definitely allowed.
Comment by Anonymous — November 19, 2009 @ 10:54 am
What mom is describing seems a little harsh, doesn’t it? So you mean to tell us that the school you toured is not the school you chose? If this is the policy, why weren’t parents aware before they enrolled? Surely all the other parents would be removing children in droves! You seem to be describing some form of kiddie work camp that treats the students like the orphans from Oliver Twist. Are you saying there is no recess? No outings? No neighborhood walks? 5 yr olds locked in a sweat box…..you have some imagination. It sounds like you just want her home with you. I think you should consider something a little more productive to do now that your child is beginning to experience life outside the cocoon.
Comment by MJean — December 2, 2009 @ 9:24 pm