Rejection isn't easy to take, no matter how it arrives. When my toddler son didn't get accepted to a neighborhood pre-school more than 10 years ago, I was new to the concept of competition for education — a commonplace of New York City life. And because he could not read the letter, I saw no reason to explain: "Umm, you weren't allowed to play Lego and learn the alphabet at School X because too many other three-year-olds wanted to do the same thing and there wasn't enough room…''

Now, before high school, the stakes are much higher. On Thursday, about 27,000 eighth-graders will learn if they'll be offered seats at one of the city's eight specialized high schools. Fewer than 6,000 students scored high enough last year to earn entry. This year as last year, another 9,000 applicants vied for just 664 spots at Fiorello H. Laguardia. And this week, the kids who took the tests and auditioned will get their placement results.

Many parents worry about especially fierce competition this year, as private-school students and their families consider free public options. Regardless, thousands of bright, talented and deserving students may not be admitted to these schools at all. Those that do may have to settle for second and third choices.

How and where students learn the actual news can be public or private. Middle-school guidance counselors are the first to learn, on February 5th, the same day results are distributed to students. At my son's school, kids can choose how they want to hear the news, and whether they'll get word in front of their equally nervous friends, with middle school staff on hand. "In the past, our students have been very supportive of one another,'' wrote my son's guidance counselor in a note to parents. The school also offered to contact parents before the letters go out "so you can be aware and support your child.''

All this reminds me, in the pit of my stomach, just how it felt when I was hoping for a thick envelope from my first-choice college a lifetime ago. But now, I won't be opening the letter. I'm grateful to my son's middle school for taking the envelope out of my hands.

I hope the students will be kind and supportive of one another, no matter what news they get. And I hope that those who are disappointed by the specialized schools will match at high schools that suit their needs and interests.

I haven't been through the entire process yet, but I can't help wondering if there is a better system for matching students to city high schools. Suggestions, anyone?