Last night, I read my daughters Bread and Jam for Frances. My favorite part is the end, when Frances relishes every bite of her sophisticated boxed lunch (Lobster salad! Cream of tomato soup!) and "makes it all come out even." Alas, in my house, a steady diet of peanut butter and jelly has done nothing to make picky Night Owl beg for something new. Cafeteria lunch? Forget it! We've tried. Each time, she eschews the healthier options in favor of a white hamburger bun dipped in ketchup. I figure we're better off packing lunch.

Volunteering in the lunchroom, I've seen an impressive variety of homemade offerings on display. There are Caribbean stews and colorful Chinese stir-fries. My friend Min, who is from Korea, makes her son freshly steamed rice, on which she arranges black beans into a letter of the day. All of these lunches look healthy and hearty, and the children devour them.

A recent New York Times article detailed the art of the bento box; some of their examples dazzlingly intricate. If I had hours to spend sculpting bunnies out of food and thought it would coax Night Owl to eat more, perhaps I would perfect this craft. And I do get the idea of the bento box: to juxtapose as many colors, textures and food groups as possible, for nutritional value and visual appeal. A friend of mine packs Laptop Lunches, westernized bento boxes she says force her to create a varied and balanced meal -- and leftovers work just fine for filling the compartments.<!--more-->

In perusing web sites and blogs on the subject, I've seen some great ideas. Epicurious showcases recipes from the book Real Food For Healthy Kids. A recent blog in New York Family offers tips on how to make school lunches more nutritious. A friend likes the Family Fun site. Surely, mixing it up works for some kids-but not mine.

Erin Patterson, founder of Small Bites, has a reassuring take on the subject: "School lunch is not the time to introduce kids to something new. It's O.K. to pack PB&J every day if that's what you know they will eat" (or a nut-free equivalent, of course). She says that if you choose healthy ingredients -- whole wheat instead of white, natural rather than processed sandwich fillings -- and add fresh fruit and vegetables, plus a healthy "extra" or two, they're getting a wholesome lunch. Family dinners are better times to introduce kids to novel foods, which they'll be more likely to try without the distractions and time constraints of the cafeteria.

I realize what all the most successful lunches, no matter how exotic or simple, have in common: when the children open their lunch boxes, they feel like they're getting a taste of home.